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Mira's Collection
Author: Allison Wonderland
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(Added on Feb 14, 2005)
(This month 24950 readers) (Total 51671 readers) |
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Rich people are known for their eccentric hobbies, and Mira is no exception. Hers just happen to include collecting humans... |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 8 |
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| 1 |
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13% |
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38% |
25% |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (8/10) |
| Average
Rating: (8/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (4/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Dryhill
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 19, 2012 |
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I agree with azrig17, the first chapter is believeable but the second is just silly. (5/10)
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| Reviewer:
azrlg17
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 19, 2006 |
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The 1st chapter is interesting but the second is beyond poor. There is no reason why Charlotte can't call the police. None. Not ONE! How would Mira destroy the key when she was in handcuffs? And even if she did there is NO lock that can't be opened with enough time. And even if Mira is a genius with an IQ of 1000 and created a lock like this you could still cut the steel from the outside (you would just have to be carful with the heat). But even if she somehow created a new alloy that is somehow uncuttable (and made millions selling it to every steel, aerospace, automotive,... company), Charlotte just would have to get a gun and shoot her into nonvital bodyparts. After the first or second kneecap Mira would beg her to be allowed to give her the key. I know this seems to be a bit technical but if the central point of the story and the whole reason why she isn't caught is so flawed it simply destroys the story.
I can't even say that the sex is good because there is none. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
H Dean
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 19, 2005 |
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An enjoyable and well written concept, over all. My main disapointments were the failure to explore the suffering and frustrations that would, no doubt, occur once these women were part of the collection. It made the story feel less personal than I think it could have been.
And one other thing - call it a pet peeve of mine - regarding structure. "Undoing" is more of a simple slang term. I would recomend using other terms.
I am looking forward to seeing the progression of this tale. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
dastardly
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 19, 2005 |
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Appealing, I can't put my finger quite on why. Hope this one grows. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
La Toya
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 17, 2005 |
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I only hope this is the first chapter. Tell how and why Mira started her collection. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
emmacd
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 16, 2005 |
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I enjoyed this a lot. It was short but stimulating.Please write more. emmacd (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Dododecapod
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 15, 2005 |
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This is exceptional. I really want to know why Mira is doing this, what happens to the "collection", and what fun stuff Mira's going to do next.
Your spelling and grammar are excellent. I noticed one spelling mistake (sorry, but they bother me), but otherwise your editing is very good. (10/10)
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- Replied by:
Dododecapod
(Edit) (Feb 19, 2005)
- Part two is good, but not as good as one. The origin of the collection is interesting, but we still don't know what Mira gets from it. Does it arouse or excite her? Does she torment any of her other acquisitions?
Still, I want to read the next section.
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 15, 2005 |
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please add more as soon as you can, so far it is GREAT, my type of story (10/10)
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