|
|
|
|
Waiting...
Author: Ally Smith
|
|
(Added on Mar 6, 2004)
(This month 48591 readers) (Total 55597 readers) |
|
Ally's fascination with the riding crops of her Mistress will inevitably get her into significant trouble... |
Ratings and Reviews: |
Number
of Ratings: 5 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
20% |
0% |
20% |
20% |
40% |
0% |
|
Weighed
Average (?): (7.5/10) |
Average
Rating: (8/10) |
Highest
Rating: (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating: (5/10) |
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
Dryhill
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 24, 2010 |
|
First story or not this is a good short story. True there is no substance to the two characters to the point it is almost impossible to picture them. i think the clue is in the description of the room, minimalist, and that is exactly how this story is told. Just an outline sketch to allow our minds do the rest. Well done. (9/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
jbowler65
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 8, 2004 |
|
Nice first effort. Good writing and good content. (8/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
teamster
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 7, 2004 |
|
really just a sketch... i like the way you got into the emotional conflicts of the sub, but there could have been much more... (5/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
e.e. norcod
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 6, 2004 |
|
Actually a very excellent short, short story. This shows what can be done in just over 10 kb, setting the mood, bringing the action to a climax and then giving the story a twist at the end. Congratulations! I definitely think that the author should check out the Fox Red Eva Forum and consider signing up for the next competition. On behalf of all the other writers on this site, Ally Smith, welcome to the BDSMLibrary! (9/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
Moggy
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 6, 2004 |
|
For a first story (which may mean the writer's first attempt at the genre) this a reasonable effort; spell-checked and proofed. Ally does an effective job setting the scene, though the subsequent action could have been paced better, as if the writer was too eager to get to the end. Please continue Ally, you have potential. (7/10)
|
|
|