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House Training
Author: RH Music
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(Added on Feb 22, 2004)
(This month 122094 readers) (Total 152344 readers) |
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Jonathan, a paralegal, is tasked by his firm to enter the house of the recently deceased, eccentric inventor Jack Hewitt to look for documents. After searching the entire house he enters the basement, where he becomes ensnared and gradually transformed by the inventor's bizarre, feminizing machines... |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 12 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (9/10) |
Average
Rating:  (9.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (8/10) |
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| Reviewer:
MarginallyTruePig
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 13, 2011 |
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Excellent! Feminization without femdom is quite rare and appreciated. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
satincuffs
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 3, 2006 |
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+HOT+ bondage fiction. The premise is what you might get if "The Matrix" had a head-on collision with a popular forced-feminization fiction site.
The writing is imperfect, and others have noted the minor issues with story flow and writing technique, but the hotness of the premise and the level of detail to which it's developed make up for more errors than I can find. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Abe Froman
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Sep 3, 2004 |
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I'm speechless, as this certainly goes into my short list of the best erotica stories I've ever read. Very hot, and an amazing premise. Read it! (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
footsub69
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 12, 2004 |
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if only you didnt stop there (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
jbowler65
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 14, 2004 |
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Very original and interesting story. Great job. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
teamster
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 7, 2004 |
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good forced feminization yarn... usually these stories have a strong fem-dom element which doesnt work for me. too bad you stopped too soon... (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
bracemaiden
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 26, 2004 |
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Quite long, and bizzarre - subbing to a computer program in a house built for the purpose? None the less, it was quite enjoyable. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
ozzystoy
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 25, 2004 |
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Simply adored this story. I found it extremely easy to place myself in the position of the main character. Just wish I could find the place myself.... (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
Will Storm
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 24, 2004 |
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Enjoyed your story very and didn't want it to end. Your words made the sights and sounds that your character encountered very real. You've got a great imagination. Look forward to more of your work. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
bisarah
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 23, 2004 |
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Excellent story ... i could stop reading! (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
curiouscat
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 23, 2004 |
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I enjoyed your story. It was like a mid-afternoon quickie, something that should be done as often as possible. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
Alex Bragi
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 23, 2004 |
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Ten out of ten for imagination and creativity! Well done!
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The only problem I really had with this was the writing itself. You need someone to edit for you. Don’t be offended, most people do. I’m certainly no exception.
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There are a few typos/spellos. A number of times too you have hyphenated where you shouldn’t have, and didn’t where you should have. While these aren’t terrible literary sins, they ‘re still distracting.
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You also have a bad habit of repeating words too closely. ‘Door’ and ‘mouth’ in the first chapter for instance. It’s an odd thing, generally, three sentences in a row (a triplet) all beginning with the same word or words can add impact, but two, or words repeated in the middle of sentences doesn't.
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On the super nit picky side, I don’t think you needed to include the exact measurements. To me these kinds of descriptions make a story read more like a documentary than a fantasy. Others probably will disagree with me.
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I noted too, that you frequently use asterisks instead of inverted commas. I know that’s how many European country do it, but here, where are majority of the reader’s first language is English, it might be best not to.
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I wish you well with your future writing.
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Alex.
(8/10)
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