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Basil Frazzled
Author: The Siren
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(Added on Oct 5, 2006)
(This month 10347 readers) (Total 19731 readers) |
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Now exposed to his young, teasing secretary as a submissive wimpie boy...Basil is further humiliated and teased! |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 2 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6/10) |
Average
Rating:  (6.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (7/10) |
| Lowest
Rating: (6/10) |
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| Reviewer:
MISTRESS H
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 13, 2008 |
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POOR BASIL, but being the whimp he is, it is deserved. Good flow, and easy reading. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
ElectricBadger
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 6, 2006 |
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good story, lots of promise, but it really needs organization. It wanders around randomly without any sequence; organize all the history into discrete flashbacks, don't intermix it. Sometimes there was a shift in topic mid line.
Make an outline of what you want to say, do some cutting and pasting, and a bit of touch up and new punctuation, and you'll have a really good piece. (6/10)
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